This ain't it.

I would like to share just a little piece of my heart with all of you tonight. 

As many of you know,

I have a special place in my heart for Honduras. 

I have had the opportunity and pleasure to travel there many times.

And each time has been even better than the time before. 

It's through Honduras, and the people there, 

that the Lord has shown me a lot about myself. 

He has shown me what I am good at.

He has shown me a lot about Himself.

He has shown me a small glimpse of what His future looks like for me.

He has shown me, what my heart beats for. 

My heart beats for him. 

It beats for my sweet Franklin.

(FYI, that's Franklin)

He's around 11 years old now. 

Wow, he's getting old.

I first met Franklin when he was 7.

He had just arrived at the Good Shepherd's Children's Home, in El Zamorano. 

He was quiet and shy and incredibly skinny.

His poor belly was big and puffy, just full of parasites. 

There was just something about him, 

all I wanted to do was hug him and squeeze his precious face. 

I've had the extreme pleasure of getting to watch sweet Franklin grow.

He's no longer the weak, frail boy he once was.

He is big and strong, and just as lovable as ever.

It's been over a year since I've seen him.

That makes me sad. 

It makes me sad knowing that I can't be there with Franklin everyday.

I'm not there to see him play with his friends and learn new things. 

I wish I had the pleasure of getting to see that.

But what kills me are the years before I knew him. 

Just thinking about all those nights he went to bed hungry.

All those days he spent begging and stealing to survive. 

All those years he spent worrying about things a 7 year old boy shouldn't need to worry about. 

It hurts me to know that I wasn't there. 

It hurts me to know that no one was there. 

This ain't it. 

There has to be more to my life than tests and papers.

There's got to be more than coffee dates and family dinners.

I'm not entirely sure what "more" is but I know that, 

this ain't it. 

All I know is that tonight as I was sitting on the couch watching Nacho Libre, 

all I kept thinking was:

"this is a mighty big couch, I wish I had some little kiddos to snuggle up with and watch TV with me"

"I wish I had a house full of little faces that needed me"

It brings tears to my eyes every time I think about all those little people out there that need me, 

and I'm here drinking an Icee and painting my nails. 

So all I know right now is that,

there's more than this.

And I fully intend on finding out what "more" is.