Fear Not.

Is anyone ever curious about why we are afraid of certain things?

Like why am I afraid of tiny little spiders?

They are so small.

Yes, they are really icky.

They have too many legs. 

And some are super poisonous and could KILL me. 

But most are harmless.

(...right?)

Or why are we all so afraid of other people?

Why do we care so much what other people think of us?

When I meet someone new, I'm not gonna lie, I'm usually stressin!

Did they think I was funny?

Do they think I'm stupid?

Did they like my shirt?

ETC...ETC...ETC...

And, yes to some degree I should care what others think of me, but not quite to that extent.

Ya know?

So what if they think I'm funny. 

I think I'm funny.

So what if they think I'm stupid.

I KNOW I'm stupid.

So what if they like my shirt. 

If I'm wearing it, then obviously I like it.

It's always really freaky when you realize what it is you are TRULY afraid of.

Just recently I've realized just how afraid I am of getting cancer.

I would say that cancer is something that is so real in everyone's lives that I'm sure we've all thought what if I get cancer?

But I would say it's a hardcore fear of mine.

At certain times in my life that fear has almost consumed. 

And for several reasons I would say it's a completely legitimate fear. 

But that doesn't give me any excuse to give into that fear. 

If I do get cancer or not it's what the Lord has for my life.

Who am I to question Him?

I have the power of the Lord Almighty fighting in my corner. 

What could possibly ever happen to me that He couldn't defeat?

What could cancerous cells do to me that He couldn't reverse?

What do I have to fear?

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

Isaiah 41:10

"In God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"

Psalm 56:11

That's all I need to know. 

The Western Aftermath.

It has been exactly ONE MONTH since I departed the beautiful peat-graveled grounds of K-West.

And I'm not gonna lie...I MISS IT. 

I mean I know I miss seeing these faces everyday!

It's been rough out here in the real world.

Life at kamp seemed hard at the time...and at the time it truly was.

But I've come to realize that life was so much simpler. 

All I had to do was hang out, talk about Jesus, sort mail and have fun.

It was so easy to love the Lord. 

He was everywhere. 

It was so simple serving Him...I mean everyone else was doing it.

It was so easy to see Him work, because everyone else saw it too.

Kamp was easy. 

Okay that's a lie, Kamp was hard. 

But living for Christ at Kamp....easy. 

I miss the ease. 

But you know what the Lord hasn't called me to easy. 

He never says being a Christian is going to be simple.

Life is hard.

Things are difficult. 

But the beauty is that because I have the Lord, He gets to handle all those unpleasantries. 

So I don't have to worry,

or stress,

or fret. 

I just get to chill and what Him do His thing!

Woop Woop!

What up I got the BEST God! 

So I just want to say to all my fellow Westerners out there...

...I MISS YA. 

K-West be rockin that party y'all. 

Hard to Forget but Painful to Remember.

So I'm pretty sure that everyone knows what today is.

It's a pretty significant day. 

Today is the 10 year anniversary of 9-11. 

It's so crazy it's been TEN years.

Part of me feels like it was just yesterday when I walked into my 5th grade P.E. class and was shocked by what I saw on the TV. 

But then part of me doesn't really remember a time before this.

I guess that comes with me being fairly young when it happened. 

But I feel like it also comes from just how drastic things changed.

No longer are airplanes and airports fun.

No longer are concerts and sporting events simple and easy.

No longer does our nation feel safe.

I think that was the big kicker. 

America has been in a fair share of wars, but for the most part they've all been fought outside of our borders.

With the exception of Pearl Harbor, we hadn't ever had a major attack against us like that.

So for me it's important to remember today.

Today is a day that marks a HUGE change in our nation.

Today is the day that someone attacked Us.

Today is the day that terror entered our lives.

Today is the day that My country was threatened.

Today is the day that My people were killed. 

Today is the day that changed America.

Today is the anniversary of 9-11.

And sometimes I think people want to forget, because today hurts.

Today is a sad day.

No question about that. 

But we can't forget. 

We have to remember.

We have to remember the fallen.

We have to remember the heros.

We have to remember the hurt.

When we forget that's when history starts to repeat itself.

And I don't know about you, but I want to make sure that NEVER happens.

So today is a day that is hard to forget, but painful to remember. 

But this day gives me hope.

Hope in an Almighty God.

Hope that He has this all under His control.

Because yes today is a day that has shaped our nation.

But it is also a day that brought this nation together.

Today is a day that showed us the pure evil that is within man.

Today is a day that made us cry out to the Lord.

And we better keep on cryin.

Even though it's ten years later, the pain and hurt are still there and the threats are real.

This nation has to make a bold move back to the Lord or we are headed for ruin.

The Lord is the only thing that can save us.

He is the only thing that can protect us.

He is it. 

And we as a nation need to realize that.

It's a Jumble Out There.

What a day it has been. 

My oh my.

You know it's been one of "those" days, but it's also been a really fun day. 

Just a little irony for you. 

You know I like to keep things fresh.

So as I'm sitting here on my bed hugging Ovaltine Jenkins (my penguin...don't judge), I'm trying to think of what I want to write tonight. 

And I've got some ideas, but I have a dilemma...

...I HAVE TOO MANY IDEAS.

My brain is like one giant flash mob right about now.

And let me tell you...they look fun from the outside...but you just get claustrophobic. 

Anyone else get that way?

I mean, I know I do so there's bound to be at least a few people out there that know what I'm talking about. 

Right?

It's like you have one idea, but before you can even finish it 7 more pop into your head.

It's very exhausting. 

So if someone were to ask me, "hey whatcha thinkin?"

I feel extremely confident that I could honestly say "I HAVE NO CLUE!"

Because I really don't. 

I feel like the Lord's got something He's trying to tell me.

Satan is just trying to make sure that doesn't happen.

Stupid Satan.

But the cool thing is that I know the Lord won't fail.

So if there is something He wants me to know, then He's going to tell me.

And there is NOTHING Satan can do about it.

He can try his absolute hardest to delay it, to confuse me, to frustrate me, etc.

And he will more than likely succeed in ALL of those areas, 

BUT, 

He won't succeed in keeping it from me. 

The Lord is better than Satan.

So if He wants me to know something, then I'm going to know it. 

And it will come at the exact moment that I NEED to know it.

I often get the "need to know" and the "want to know" confused.

So let me just state that one more time.

He will tell me when I NEED it.

Not necessarily when I WANT it.

So take that Satan.

Let's see if you can win.

HA.

YOU CAN'T.

BOOM.

A Life Worth Living.

I would just like to start of by saying the Lord is GOOD.

He is always so much better than I am expecting. 

Shocker.

I had originally planned to write about something that had been going on in my life for a while...

...but within the last 14 minutes or so I've changed my mind.

I'm going to write about something that I feel like has always been going on in my life, but it also just started about 17 minutes ago.

Confused?

Me too.

Throughout the years I have been blessed with the opportunity to serve the Lord in many different ways and in many different places. 

Missions has always been in my life. 

I went on my first mission trip in 7th grade.

And I haven't stopped since.

It's an addiction.

You start to crave the challenges, the rewards, the sacrifices, the blessings.

You miss the relationships you make. 

You miss investing so heavily in people.

You miss walking through life with those on your team. 

You miss being aware of the Lord working so blatantly.

Mmm. 

I know I miss them.

Once you go international, there's no going back.

Once you go, you HAVE to keep going.

It's one of those experiences that can't leave you untouched.

You can't come back unchanged. 

When you get to interact with people from a different culture or a different background, the world just opens up.

You're introduced to new ways of thinking, new perspectives.

The Lord proves that He NEVER changes.

The same God that I pray to in English is the same God that Rhys prays to in Welsh.

The same God that answers his prayers, answers mine.

The same God that forgives him, forgives me.

And that is something that instantly bonds you with people.

You may only have that one thing in common, but that's all that matters.

And you always hear about all the orphans in Africa and all the hungry in Asia and all the poor in South America, etc, etc.

But it's different when it's Arturo that's the poor hungry orphan. 

Now it's not just some random number or statistic. 

It's this chubby little boy with pudding on his face. 

He's why I go.

They are why I go.

(And also because I LOVE IT)

If anything I get addicted to seeing the crazy stuff the Lord does.

He is quite the creative fellow. 

And it becomes somewhat addicting to watch Him surprise you.

Give it a try and see how it goes. 

So that's how missions has always been in my life.

But until about 26 minutes ago it has become my life.

This is what I was made for.

I was made to go.

I'm made to be a friend to the friendless.

I'm made to be a help to the helpless.

I'm made to be a mother to the motherless.

I'm made to be Christ to the Christless.

I am made for this. 

This is me. 

God made me for His people.

I have to go.

I have no clue what all this means.

I could end up in a hut in Africa,

or a lean-to in Guatemala, 

or a flat in London, 

or a farm in Nebraska, 

or a house in Louisiana. 

I don't know where or what or how yet.

All I do know is that this is what I was made for. 

And this is what I have to do.

Pure Joy.

Today was my first full day back in Ruston.

And what a day it has been!

It began with church.

Pure Joy.

Crossroads is a body of believers unlike any other.

The commitment to preach unaltered, unfiltered, uncut gospel is astounding.

I love it.

I feel so loved and cared for there, and I don't even know most of the people that go there. 

Worship there is always a TREAT.

They do an excellent job of making me want to keep singing.

I never want to stop singing and dancing for my Lord.

I feel sorry for the folks sitting next to me cause I sing LOUD and BAD. 

But ya know what?

I sing PROUD.

I am worshiping my King. 

I am worshiping my Creator.

I am worshiping I AM.

I will NOT hold back. 

I'm giving it all I've got.

And if all I've got is super loud and off key then that's what He's getting.

And the best part is...HE LOVES IT.

My atrocious singing is beautiful in His ears.

So guys I'm sorry if I make your ears bleed, but I'm not singing for you.

Also typically when I worship, I can't just stand still.

I've got to move around.

I get a little groove going and I just go.

I figure HEY if King David can dance for the Lord then so can I.

So, I'm going to dance. 

If I bump into you, so sorry, but I can't help it.

I can't just stand there.

I gotta groove fer da Laurd. 

I would also like to share something that was shown to me today.

As I was dancing and singing and smiling I was just overwhelmed by the Lord's Spirit.

I felt like I could hardly stand. 

He was that overwhelming.

It was the WORLD'S GREATEST FEELING.

I never wanted that moment to end.

In that amazing moment I realized something...

...if the Lord is this incredible and completely overwhelming...

...how can I ever think that anything I am dealing with could even phase me?

HE IS THIS GREAT.

How could anything seem that bad, when I have Him?

It's the End of an Era.

So today is September 1st. 

DANG.

And with the coming of this day brings the end of an era.

This marks the end of summer. 

SO SAD. 

It's time to get myself together.

Tomorrow I head back to North LA. 

I've gotta get all my stuff packed.

(I'm close! Oh so close!!)

I've gotta get that car washed and loaded down. 

It's so weird to think that I'm about to go back to "real life."

What does that even mean????

I can't even begin to remember what "real life" is. 

This has been one CRAZY summer.

This summer has been one of the most difficult and challenging times in my life. 

But it's also been one of the most exciting and rewarding times too.

The things I've experienced have been life changing.

The Lord has worked and moved.

And I've gotten to watch it all firsthand. 

And what a show it has been. 

But now it's time to DO WORK.

I am so pumped for this year at school. 

The Lord is going to do some serious work at Tech.

I can't wait to be a part of what He has planned for me.

I know He's going to use my specific gifts and talents for His kingdom.

But I also know that I'm not even going to realize He's doing it.

He's pretty sneaky like that.

The Lord has made me uniquely.

(Psalm 139:13-16)

He made me with purpose. 

(Ecclesiastes 3:1, Jeremiah 1:5)

He made me specifically for that purpose. 

The really cool thing is that since He's made me uniquely and specifically for special purposes, what makes me think I can't accomplish whatever He puts in front of me.

HELLO.

He said I am made specifically for this.

So I will have everything I need to do what He needs me to.

And if you still have doubts...

...the Lord says that He will always provide you WHATEVER you may need.

(Philippians 4:19)

Therefore, if I am truly working hard to do what the Lord has made me for then how could I fail?

How can the Lord not prevail??

The Lord will always succeed. 

Therefore, I will always succeed.

(Jeremiah 1:17-19) 

Well as long as I keep doing what He wants and not what I want.